


Revelations

by ImBadWithWords



Category: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Identity Reveal, Post-Spider-Man: Homecoming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-04
Updated: 2018-07-04
Packaged: 2019-06-05 05:46:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15163982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImBadWithWords/pseuds/ImBadWithWords
Summary: “I really wish I was more surprised,” she whispered. “But you? A hero? Oh honey, I knew the second you landed on my doorstep that you were going to do so much good for the world.” She ran her fingers through his messy hair and Peter’s stomach roiled, tears threatening to spill. He leaned into her touch, closing his eyes.“I could have saved Ben,” he confessed.





	Revelations

“What the  _ fuck?!” _

Peter’s face dropped. His heart leapt into his throat, his muscles tensed. He could see his own terrified expression in the mirror. Even worse, now that he knew she was there, he could see May over his shoulder, staring dumbfounded in the doorway of his bedroom. He turned slowly.

“I-I-I thought you were out,” he stammered. She held up a white plastic bag in one hand, her eyes never tearing from the bright red of his spidey suit.

“I went to Delmar’s to get ice cream for after dinner. Peter, what the fuck is this?”

“...a really good cosplay?”

She pursed her lips, a flash of frustration briefly overtaking the sheer terror gathering on her face. 

“Not the time for jokes, kid. Oh my god, I need to sit down.” May backed out of the door and Peter nabbed his hoodie from where it had been discarded on the floor, pulling it over his head as he followed her into the kitchen.

“Please don’t freak out,” he pleaded. “If you freak out, I’ll freak out, and I really don’t know how much freak-out I can handle today.”

He saw her eyes flicker to an unopened bottle of wine sitting on the countertop before she made an abrupt turn and got two spoons from the cutlery drawer. She dumped the bag of ice cream on the circular kitchen table and dropped into a nearby chair.

“Sit,” she said. “This is gonna be an over-ice-cream conversation.”

Peter eased into the seat next to her, keeping silent. Her shoulders were heaving in the way he recognized signalled thinly concealed panic, her mouth tense and uneasy. He wasn’t sure the last time he’d seen her so unnerved; maybe in the days following Ben’s death.

“The corner store didn’t have your favorite, so I got you this instead.” She pulled a pint of Haagen-Daz belgian chocolate from the bag, pushing it toward him with a spoon sitting on the lid. Peter couldn’t bring himself to meet her eyes. He stared at the yellow smiley face on the bag instead.  _ Thank you!,  _ it read. _ Have a nice day!  _ Uh-huh.

“I don’t— “ she tried. She tore open the lid of her own pint, stabbing the frozen top with her spoon. “Why didn’t— How did this happen?”

He took time in opening his carton. “I got bit by a spider.”

May laughed, the sound a little shrill, a little on-edge.

“A spider? Petey, the world is a wonderful place and I’ve seen a lot of crazy shit in the past few years, but you’re gonna have to give me a little more than that.”

He dug the edge of his spoon into the ice cream, scooping some out but not eating it. “It was an Oscorp spider. Enhanced, somehow, I don’t know all the details. Something to do with super soldier serum.”

“As in Captain America, super soldier?”

“Yeah.”

May took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She took another. She shovelled a spoonful of Cherry Garcia into her mouth.

“Okay,” she said eventually. “Super soldier. Alright. And instead of going to the hospital you decided, what? To put on a pair of tights and fight crime? Honey, I know superheroes have been running around New York for nearly a decade but that is  _ insane.” _

Peter dropped his eyes. “I know.”

“And before you had this—” she gestured to his suit, “--whole setup, it was literally sweatpants, wasn’t it? That’s what I saw on YouTube. Where did you even get something like—” She stopped. Her eyes widened. “Oh my god. That bastard, I am going to _kill_ him.”

“None of this is Mr. Stark’s fault,” Peter rushed to say. “He’s been trying to convince me to stay low to the ground, stay out of the big stuff. He only gave me the suit to make sure I didn’t get into trouble.”

“He lied to me,” she grit. “He came into my home and _lied_ to me, put my baby in danger and kept me completely in the dark.”

“That’s not it—”

“He had no right to keep this from me.”

“I asked him to.”

May flinched. Peter’s heart broke, it’s jagged edges forming a lump in his throat as he took in her pained expression.

“I asked him to, May,” he croaked. “I-I didn’t want you to worry. You worry enough about me as it is and I hate that, I hate that I take up so much of your time and energy already and you don’t get enough for yourself and—”

“Don’t you dare say another word, Peter.” He forced himself to look up into her face and found her eyes were wet. “You’re worth every second of my time. If I had more seconds in a day, I’d give them all to you, do you hear me?” She grabbed his hand in both of hers, her thumb running over the raised edging of his gloves where he was still holding his mask. His eyes burned and she let go with one hand to hold the side of his face, the other still squeezing his fingers.

“I really wish I was more surprised,” she whispered. “But you? A hero? Oh honey, I knew the second you landed on my doorstep that you were going to do so much good for the world.” She ran her fingers through his messy hair and Peter’s stomach roiled, tears threatening to spill. He leaned into her touch, closing his eyes.

“I could have saved Ben,” he confessed.

The kitchen filled with aching silence. May’s hand froze against his cheek. He knew it was coming, the angry demand for answers, the rejection. He could have kept this revelation to himself, accepted May’s undeserved praise and stolen love, but with one secret out he found the rest wanting to follow, dug up from a dark, hollow place in his chest.

“I could have saved him but I didn’t, I was stupid and selfish and just wanted to use my powers for myself and  _ I’m  _ the one who should have gotten hurt but it was Ben instead and I’m so sorry, May, I am so, so sorry.”

Tears flowed freely down his face. He tamped down on the sob building in his throat; he didn’t get to cry about something that was his fault.

Suddenly she was hugging him. She’d gotten to her feet, wrapping her arms around him in the fiercest hug he’d ever felt, her face buried in the top of his hair.

“Oh, Petey…” Her voice was thick with tears of her own. “Christ, Petey-pie, how long have you been carrying that?” She started swaying, rocking him back and forth like she used to do when he woke up from nightmares as a kid. A hand rubbed up and down between his shoulder blades. “It was not your fault, honey.”

“I could have stopped it.” His tears dampened the front of her sweater as she held him close. “I could have prevented it and I didn’t. That’s— that’s almost as bad as k-killing him myself.”

Her arms somehow tightened a notch further. “Baby, I don’t know how a genius like you gets these stupid ideas. A million different things could have stopped it. For  _ weeks  _ I wondered that if I hadn’t insisted on living in a city with such a high crime rate, because Ben had wanted to move to the suburbs when we got you, would he still be here? And the answer is yes. Yes, if I had made a different choice, Ben would be alive.” She pressed a kiss to the top of his head. 

“But I didn’t know. There was no way I could have known the outcome of that decision. The only choice that really mattered was the robber’s choice to pull the trigger. That’s it, that’s what it came down to. It wasn’t you, Peter. Please don’t ever think that.”

They fell into silence. May didn’t let go, rocking him as gently as if he were a newborn she was trying to soothe, and eventually Peter found the strength in his limbs to wrap his arms around her waist. After several long minutes, May spoke up.

“I think the ice cream is melting.”

That startled a watery laugh from Peter. He pulled back to look up at her, see the love in her eyes. She smiled and kissed his forehead.

“Just this once, you get to have dessert before dinner. I suggest you take advantage of it.” She pushed the carton of chocolate ice cream closer to him and he picked up his spoon, but she seemed to think of something and pulled the pint back.

“Hold on,” she said. “There is a  _ long  _ conversation to be had about all this, and I am going to yell Tony Stark’s ear off tomorrow, but my baby boy is a superhero and I have yet to see him in full costume.” She nodded at the mask in his hand. Peter grinned and slipped it over his head.

The light blue display came to life in front of his eyes, the screens flickering on in front of May’s weary but smiling face. Karen’s voice came over the speakers:

_ << This is going to sound controversial, but I think that went well. >> _

Peter burst out laughing.

**Author's Note:**

> taking prompts at peteyprker.tumblr.com!


End file.
